Everything is due Monday. I am trying to organize everything that is and is not finished, finish what is not finished, and make sure I am not missing anything. It sounds so easy, but certainly is not. Still, shouldn't I feel impending glee at the thought of being done? Shouldn't I be at peace, knowing I won't have to figure all this out after Monday, knowing everything will work out, as it always does? Then why am I so stressed all of a sudden? I'm fine till I start facing it all and trying to do it, and then my heart starts beating faster and it's harder to breathe or to think. These are the symptoms that perpetuate procrastination in my life. But I don't want to procrastinate--I want it all to be done. Why is this so hard? God?
Please pray for me. I AM excited about the coming freedom and possibilities of actually making money rather than watching it continue to be siphoned away, month by month, as I need to put gas in my car, pay car insurance, keep up with my Compassion International commitment, and (lately) buy several wedding presents. I have less money than I owe or need right now. It's all up to God now. Forced dependence:)--it can be a good thing, when God is involved. Soli Deo gloria as I finish out these 17 years and move on to--what? Good question.
:)
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